Helen Keller once said, “The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” It’s been told that we fall in love three times with three different people during our life. And each of them teach us a remarkable lesson.
The First Love
During our high school years we fall into a fairytale-like styled love. This is the kind of love that we enter hard-headed and we may even seem stubborn at times. No matter how much this love isn’t working we avoid our feelings deep inside and continue blindly.
During this love, we’re simply more obsessed about what others think about us instead of listening to ourselves. I can remember like it was yesterday when I acted this way.
The second love
The second love is really powerful and strong. Here we learn important lessons about how we want to be loved and what we want. This love hurts us. It’s when we undergo hard times of deception, manipulation and pain.
We continue making bad choices thinking that “we learned our lesson” a long time ago, but life doesn’t work like that unfortunately. You see, the second love becomes a cycle that keeps on spinning in new similar situations. Often times when we try to end it, it becomes worse than before.
This is unhealthy and toxic, with enormous amounts of manipulation and drama. It’s an emotional roller coaster with highs and lows. We become addicted like a junkie and wait for the next fix to get high again. This is the love that we must learn to stop and heal from in order to let our third love find us.
The third love
The third love however is when you feel that connection as if you’ve known this person your entire life. They’re the missing piece to your love-life puzzle. There are no expectations, nor any pressure about being someone you’re not. You feel like they can understand you and immediately trust them. Finally, we are accepted for who we really are.
Most of us have maybe never experienced all three of these loves, but that’s probably because you’re not ready to. Sometimes it takes an entire lifetime to learn our lessons, other times only a few years. It’s all about how you play your cards.
In the end, all three loves are a major benefit and teach us life-long lessons (especially the second one). The school of love keeps us in balance with our deepest emotions, teaching us what we really want in life. And when things get ugly, we are taught to let go. Once we release ourselves from the mental drainage of a toxic love, we spread our arms and accept the third love into our hearts. What beautiful about the third love is that we never see it coming.
I’m going to end this article just as I started it, with a beautiful quote about the third love:
“Most people want to be circled by safety, not by the unexpected. The unexpected can take you out. But the unexpected can also take you over and change your life. Put a heart in your body where a stone used to be.” – Ron Hall
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